Wedding Bliss

I married myself today. 

The ring for the ceremony was originally sized for my left ring finger.  The ring has a long story attached to it.  As you can see I can write a lot so I’ll spare you the story.  I had it sized down to fit my pinky finger.  I smudged it with sage.  Smudging, is a process used to remove negative energy out of metals and/or gems.  Once smudging occurs the best thing to do is charge the metal/gem with positive energy. I have nothing but good energy and hopes for myself and those positive thoughts are what now charges the metal and gems on the ring.

How does one marry themselves?  I’ll tell you.

For each small diamon on the ring I wrote a vow to myself.  7 vows for 7 diamonds. No, I will not be sharing them.  I know, that sucks, but the truth is that most everything I do I associated with friends, boyfriends and/or family members.  I thought to have a small ceremony with my closest friends followed by a brunch or drinks, but I really just wanted this for myself, which is why I’m not sharing vows.  It is a pact…a bond with myself and only with myself. 

I drove to the river in Irvington.  I have fond memories of the area and looking across what seemed to be endless water, I said my vows out loud into the wind. The sun was bright, which I was grateful for.  New York has been so cold and I wanted to do my ceremony outside – in nature. Once I professed my vows, I placed the ring on my left pinky. I care not if I keep it on that pinky or move it to the right pinky.  It is simply a symbol to remind me of the commitments…the vows I have made to myself.

I wish I could say that I have always been good to myself, but that wouldn’t be the truth. Like most people my past experiences have left me maladjusted.  I continuously have to lift myself up and out of my despair and that never starts with me building myself up.  There is something fundamentally wrong with that.  Unfortunately, it always starts more with me trying to get over something or someone else.  I needed something like this wedding to adjust where I fall on my list of important people.  Like the “It’s all about me” daily calendar, the weeding ceremony and now the ring are to remind me that I am the most important person in my life.  I am the leading lady in the movie of my life and not the supporting actress (like Kate Winslet’s character came to find out in the movie The Holiday).  I am loveable and valuable and have many things to offer.

congratulations on my self-nuptuals.  I look forward to many years of wedding bliss with me, myself and I.

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